hey everyone. i'm kind of drunk actually. but i also lost my little bear cub today. it was so surprising. I was not prepared to make the euthanasia decision this afternoon. but riley was like i'd never seen him before. he didn't want to hang out when we returned last night. he threw up a couple of times, and none of them involving chunks of undigested food like normal. and he just clearly was unmotivated to fight to be active. it's hard losing a friend of 10 years. someone who has been there for you through a lot of difficult times and heartbreak. your best friend when you had no one else to talk to. riley was undeniably cuddly and friendly and super sweet. handsome. the best boy kitty to ever exist. i didn't expect this. he was supposed to live for forever. he was like "a pit bull trapped in a cat's body" like the vet techs said. very strong. extremely ready to take on the world. i brought him to the vet in mid may for his typical checkup, albeit a bit late according to his typical schedule. All bloodwork was normal, and he seemed super healthy. Then when we returned this weekend he was so weird. And a day later, he's gone. I did everything i could, and i understand that. but still. he's just a little cub. And I miss him. he was such a good kitty. loyal, sweet, sometimes very protective and mean about it, vocal, big. ready. protective. and he was also the most amazing sweet kitty of all time. I miss you riley. And I love you.